It had never occured to Eppie that, eventually, Jae really would have to get his own home and his own life. She felt a little silly; she could hardly see a Phalanx that didn’t have a Jae somewhere near it. It would be a dark day if ever he left, she knew. She was glad that Ash had no plans to push the man completely out of the bird’s nest just yet. “Me either, honestly. Phalanx and Jae are so intertwined in my head. It’s going to be hard enough to get used to him living not in the main house,” she admitted with a laugh.

She could hardly imagine Jae, all knob-knees and sloppy grin as a teenager, walking around the streets of New Orleans with what had to be the most adorable version of Scooby Doo in the world. Ash could have easily said no and found a stuffed dog for Jae to carry, but he had agreed to the scheme. It must have been a magical moment between the two of them, and she really did want to find those pictures. Her brain sort of stopped for a second when he pointed out that, technically, he would have been naked in them, and though she eventually got his meaning, her blush did little to fade. She tried to laugh it off, but there were images in her head she couldn’t quite shake, that she, admittedly, didn’t exactly want to shake. Still, she struggled for words to reply with. “I mean, you’re wearing a collar at least. That’s something,” she replied, trying to keep her voice even.

Her admittance had been a big step for her, and she sat in quiet for a little bit, trying to stitch together all the parts of life she had tossed to the side. The kiss in her classroom, the way she found herself watching him sometimes, the way she felt a little bit safer when he was in the room. They had all had meaning all along, but she was finally able to let the moments be. Together, they all painted a picture she didn’t want to deny anymore, even if that scared her all the more.

She had always been cautious in these sort of situations; she had always felt more like a bomb squad than a girl with a crush. She had to sort everything out, compartmentalize it, snip the right wire, and diffuse the situation. Usually, that meant she had to let it go, and she could count on one hand the amount of times she had leaned into the experience and let something real grow in its stead. The prospect terrified her. There were too many unanswered questions and too many ways she could royally fuck it up. For once, she wanted the risk. She didn’t want to sit quietly by while whatever she felt faded into a dull ache; she wanted to lean into it, into him.

She wanted to know everything about him and the others close to him. Carver was still a bit of an enigma to her; she didn’t really understand his bond with Ash. He, at times, seemed much more like a liability than an asset, but she was happy to have him around. The kids, even the most reluctant among them - or perhaps it was mostly them -, absolutely adored the man. He had a raw sort of compatriotism that was infectious to them. Ash’s explanation of their first meeting did little to explain the relationship between the two, at least on the surface, but she watched his face, saw the reverence there. “And that was the beginning of your beautiful friendship?” she laughed. Were all relationships in Monroeville like that - volatile, violent? That was a question she didn’t exactly want to know the answer to.

Her smile was paper thin and did little to hold back the blush that was blooming. She wanted to think that he couldn’t possibly mean that, but if there was one thing she knew about Ash, it was that his word was always good. He meant what he said and said what he meant. “You’ve got a house full of love and happiness, which is more than most of us misfit superheroes could ever want.” Cheeks still blazing, she looked away from him for just a second, as if she couldn’t say her next piece and look at him at the same time. “Besides, I’ve always been partial to the Charles Xavier types.” He had all that and more, she knew. She had never truly sat down and thought about the future beyond the school year, but he made her want to.

The chill did little to help the heat of her cheeks, but she could at least blame some of it on the wind. Her eyes found him across the hood of the van. She was almost sad to see him shove his hands in his pockets, and it took her a half-second to realize that it was because she had wanted to hold his hand. She was nearly twenty-nine, and his presence had reduced her to a young teenager with her first crush. She felt like a fool, and she did not want those butterflies to leave quite yet.

Her laughter filled their space in the crowded parking lot. “They have to be good for something, I guess,” she said with a shake of her head. “I suppose into the madding crowd we go. Pajamas are our first target?”

awk babies

Astor Oliver Perona

Eppie could certainly understand that. She had paved her way with plenty of mistakes, though her margin of error was greater than Ash’s. Ash had a lot riding on him and the success of Phalanx, but ten years later, it was still going strong. He had figured it out along the way, which was more than most could say. She was just happy to have a part in all of that. “He still may tear the house down. That is one unpredictable kid,” she laughed, shaking her head. She loved Jae the same way she loved everyone else in Phalanx. They were all so near and dear to her heart; she had not felt so involved and useful for a long time. She had always felt slightly of place everywhere she had lived and worked before, as though she had something she desperately wanted to tell but couldn’t. At Phalanx, there was none of that. She understood the students and their struggles, and they understood hers. It was glorious.

“I mean, a wolf in New Orleans is probably not the strange thing anyone here has ever seen, if we’re being honest,” she told him with a laugh. It really was quite the mental image, though, as well as the ones she was trying to aggressively shove toward the back of her head.

The concept of ability-blocking orderlies surprised her, but she figured that Monroeville had to have a way to keep at least some control. The only abilities she really knew of were the kids at Phalanx and her own families; there were things out there that she could probably not wrap her head around. The idea of a man who turned into metal was enough to shock her, but it only seemed to double when he mentioned her mother. She knew that Ash had memories of the woman; she had seen them. She had not realized, however, how deep they went. It was strange to think of her mother being such a motherly figure to others. She didn’t know how she felt about the concept.

She had half a year to even try to think about the concept of her mother period; before that, she had no real idea that the woman existed besides a stray feeling or impulse. To think that she lived an entire life behind lock and key in Monroeville; it was a staggering thought.

The bewildering thoughts made her smile all the same. “Someday, I would like to hear more about her, I think. From stories, of course; we don’t have to go digging in your brain again.”

Oh, she had really started something now, hadn’t she? She tried to hide her smile as she appraised his hair. “They’re both great looks, but I have to say that I like the length,” she admitted with a laugh. She could do this, she told herself. She could be light and fun; she could indulge in a little bit flirting now that she knew he didn’t think of her as just a schoolmarm he hired to herd the children back and forth. Besides, they may as well enjoy their time away from the herd. If there was one thing she knew, it was that, if any of the kids caught wind that something more than a borderline inappropriately long kiss had taken place, the two of them would never hear the end of it. Especially if it got back to Jae and Carver.

So she could afford to allow herself to flirt as they flicked through pajamas.

“I’m following your lead, then. You probably know this place better than me,” she informed him. Pajamas and gifts were their main goals, though, and she wanted to make every purchase perfect. They walked close toward the store, both from necessity with the crowds but also because of the warmth they were slowly gaining back between them. It still crept into her cheeks every time their hands came so close, only to swing back away again.

It was middle school all over again, and for all her years, she realized she was barely any bolder than she was then. That wouldn’t do. The next time their hands swung close, she attempted to fall in step with his movements, their hands synching up until all she had to was lightly connect them. It was an easily breakable hold; she left it open for him to pull away, as though it was but a trick of their movements.

“I have so many leftover college shirts that I should be good on pajamas for a long time.” She laughed, but her gaze roamed around for the perfect place to start their shopping, the list of sizes and ideas in her free hand. Before she could find anything useful to their current list, however, she found the negligees that were more transparent than anything else. She certainly didn’t have anything like that and had to look away before thoughts started circulating.

“Oh, uh, here are some for the girls,” she spilled out a little quickly, pulling her attention to a rack of more teenager-appropriate sleepwear. “What kind of design do you think Asha or Cora would like?” Yes, that was acceptable conversation, she told herself. They had come in for stuff for the kids.

awk babies

Astor Oliver Perona

“My first day down here, I’m pretty sure I saw a fox in a window in the French Quarter. Just hanging out like it belonged there.” New Orleans was definitely a place of supernatural pilgrimage as far as she could tell. It added that much more flavor to the city.

Her brow raised, her natural curiosity piqued despite herself, and she tried to laugh it off. “Mr. Perona, are you insinuating that you have quite the past?” She could hardly doubt it. He was half-way through his 30’s. She was nowhere naive enough to believe he hadn’t seen his fair share of “relationship stuff” in his time, and it was probably quite a bit more than she had had. She had only a couple serious anythings and only a handful of any other encounters, most of which she would rather forget for any number of reasons. Clumsy, handsy boys in high schools, crossed lines in college, awkward mornings: she had seen them all. She wasn’t too keen on sharing those either.

When he mentioned Monroeville, Eppie looked away from him for a second, evidently trying to process the idea. It hardly seemed that simple to her, as though the solution was really just right there the entire time. She had felt, since she found out about Mena, there had to be more steps. There had to be more division between the two of them. It had not even occurred to her that she could just walk into Monroeville and sign some papers and see the woman who had been kept from her her entire life. She felt a little foolish and flushed. “I, uh, I hadn’t thought of that, Ash. They would just...let me see her?”

The thought lifted her nearly as much as Ash’s grin did, the brightness chasing the old cobwebs from her mind. His hand had found its way back to her knee, and she covered it with her own without thinking. Yes, she could certainly do this. Phalanx was a world away, and eventually, she could do the same there, she knew. Just not yet. She didn’t want the whispers and the encouragement for something they were just beginning to tease out themselves. No, Phalanx would have to come later, when there was less of a chance of Jae and Carver scaring away whatever delicate thing was happening between the two of them. She was content to be beside him, to get closer and closer as they walked, to let that slippery thing called fate draw them further in. She had always appreciated the idea of serendipity.

“You know? I can totally see that. That’s a very Jae thing,” she laughed. She could just see it: Jae wrestling his way through the crowds to get the absolutely perfect presents. He seemed to care deeply about all the residents at Phalanx and like he would be the type to try to get exactly what they wanted. She couldn’t like that she was happy that Ash had chosen her that day, though. Already, the two of them had done a lot of talking she had never expected.

She blushed fiercely at his insinuation, and for a second she forgot what she was exactly trying to do. Or how to speak. It came back with a bit a sputter. “Some of them are getting a thin and ratty, but at least I don’t have to strap myself in them like..” She paused to wave her hand at the overly complicated, strappy gowns. “Whatever those things are.” She hooked her hair behind her ear and laughed a little nervously, feeling young again once more. “But I’m glad you approve.”

She eagerly thumbed through the girl’s pajamas, trying to find something cute for them all. The ones he picked out for Asha were adorable. “I’m sure she’ll love them, Ash.” She wrote a tiny check mark beside Asha’s name. That was one done. “For Cora, these blue floral ones would be cute, yeah? Nellie might like these star ones. Prue would like these cactus ones.” That crossed quite a few names off the list; she kept flicking through the pajamas for the rest. The pajamas were such a cute tradition. "So, what are some other Phalanx traditions I should be prepared for?"

awk babies

Astor Oliver Perona

Eppie watched him as he spoke with reverence about his home. She had been dying to get away from her hometown, and as given to sentimentality as she was, it didn’t feel anywhere near as home-y as New Orleans had. It had her grandparents and the unluckiest of her high school friends, and that was just about it. If she could convince them to move down (and she was sure she could), all the best parts of her life would be in one city, and she’d never want to leave. At least not for long. “I love that, Ash. You’ve put down impressive roots here.” Could she dare to see herself as part of them one day?

“The question of chastity aside, I would hardly consider that kiss stolen, you brute.” She could have pushed him away at any time in the room, could have ended it and gone straight to her room and packed. But she hadn’t. She had returned it full and well - even ardently. She had let the moment stretch longer and longer, and though she had not dissected the action with him, she hardly regretted it. At least, not now that she knew he didn’t regret it either and that she hadn’t been dreaming about the way he looked at her. “Or perhaps it was the other way around. Perhaps I orchestrated the whole thing, left the mistletoe exactly for Jae to find. The world may never truly know.” She wished she could take credit for such a thing.

She hardly remembered the first part of his statement after he revealed the nickname they had called her in Monroeville. In a way, it was just strange to think of him knowing even a tiny bit of her before she knew him; on the other hand, monster baby was the most interesting thing she had ever even remotely been called in her life. “Monster Baby? That is definitely a new one.” She mulled it over in her head; she wanted to know more. Now that the possibility was in front of her, she wanted so much more. She wanted to see Mena and ask her her own questions. All she had to do was actually get into the hospital, which couldn’t be more than a formality.

Still, the thought of going to Monroeville sent a shiver up her spine, and she had only heard of it in passing. She knew she shouldn’t ask him to accompany her; she knew it was wrong to ask him to return to that place, even if it was on the other side. Going alone seemed just as impossible. She wavered between words and ideas, all of the concepts swimming in her head. No, she couldn’t ask him, she decided. “Maybe I could, uh, call ahead and see what it would take to get in to meet her,” she thought aloud, chewing the inside of her bottom lip. Her mother had faced the hospital alone for 28 years; she could surely do so for an hour or two.

Jae’s early antics brought back her smile. She could see him, all sinew and scrap. “He looks like he knows how to fight himself out of a corner. Most of the kids do, really.” Their lives had been so different than hers growing up; she couldn’t imagine most of their lives. When files crossed her desk, she often didn’t even bother with trying to read their histories until she knew she was in a place where she could cry. “Here’s hoping to that. I’d love to be a companion on more outings like this.” Anything she could do for the kids, she would gladly do it.

She had not considered any unintended consequences for referring to her sleep shirts in their current shabby state. She could hardly think of herself in a too-big LSU volleyball t-shirt as anything worth a second glance. Ash’s sleep habits on the other hand… that was a completely different beast. She turned away slightly, to avoid his direct gaze on her widening eyes. “Oh, I didn’t even think that you might get too hot during the night. Uh, temperature-wise, you know, of course.” Beautiful. Flawless. She was an English teacher, but her words got jumbled when it came to him.

She could remember Christmas Eves with her grandparents, when Louis’s cheeks were red with wine and he kept dozing in his chair while Ana and she made sure Santa had the prettiest plate of cookies they could find. Only the best ones that actually looked like angels or christmas trees would work; she got to eat the rejects. She smiled a little blithely at the simplicity of it, before life was complicated and twisting. “I love all the Christmas traditions and all the care you put into them. Phalanx is a real home, you know? And I appreciate that.” She found pajamas that fit some of the other girls on the list, checking off their names. The boys would be next, and she was already wandering over that way.

awk babies

Astor Oliver Perona